6 Minutes to Thrive in a ‘Changed’ World (part 9)

(Continuation of ‘6 Minutes to Complete Health’)

How can the individual contribute to peace?

What does good or bad mean? What is admissible in certain situations – even praised – is considered a crime in another situation, a different country, or another religion. What forms our value system – what are values anyway? Are we born with certain values or are they the result of upbringing, our environment?

The brain of a baby is not fixed, being malleable it will change dramatically throughout its life. Doubling its size until the end of the first year, 80% is already formed at age 3.

Neurons - nerve cells which send messages all over our body to facilitate breathing, talking, thinking, moving – are connected by neurotransmitters, linking one cell to another at junctions called synapses. Due to the huge outside influence during the first years of a baby, synapses develop at a rapid speed resulting in twice as much as needed as an adult. This surplus is gradually eliminated in a process called ‘blooming and pruning’, implying that having same thoughts will strengthen the respective connection while neglecting certain thought processes will slowly disrupt the respective connection.

Due to the above the first 4-6 years are of crucial impact on the personal development of the child.  Which neurotransmitter is (un)knowingly strengthened, by upbringing, societal influence, family values - which ones are ignored, subsequently weakening the corresponding connection.

What role does genetics play? There is still no conclusion to the question of ‘Nature or Nurture’ as it has shown to be relative to the individual.  

However, another aspect has emerged during the last 20 years. Transgenerational Trauma or Epigenetic Inheritance describes the possibility of a genetic memory, a phenomenon in which certain kinds of memories could be inherited, even in the absence of any associated sensory experience. 

The outbreak of the Ukraine war has revealed an interesting reaction: Some of those who have lived through the traumata of WW2 have started to experience unpleasant flash backs – even though no precise memories can be described. This might still be understandable as certain memories might have been triggered by the daily news. However, more startling is the effect on their offsprings or even the generation after. Without being told anything – as the respective generation did not talk about their experience – they describe specific moments they feel haunted by.

According to the newest but not yet conclusive research, our physical life does not start on the day we were born, not even at the moment we were conceived. Instead, physical life seems to be a manifestation of collective consciousness, of all the experiences of our ancestors. Without remembering anything precisely, a vague imprint occupies our subconsciousness.

So, if - starting from birth - a newborn is already conditioned in a certain way – where is the proof of the intrinsic good that we want to believe in – the spark of compassion, empathy, and love which might carry us through the upheavals of life?

Maybe we must go one step further away from judging what is good, what is evil as it is so much entangled and distorted in the depth of our human perception.

Looking into the eyes of a toddler you can’t help but perceive something pure, and whole, full of unwavering trust – life can only be good, the ‘knowing’ that ‘God’ would not put us on Earth and watch us falling apart. But this is not about religion, my God, your God, not about rules and regulations. This is about spiritual connection, the conscious belief and trust in something greater, the knowing that I am enough, I am alright – the mere existence is a confirmation of my value.

At some time, we seem to lose this spiritual connection. We learn the dos and don’ts very early; society asks us to conform to norms that were set up by others to make life easier. We know that we should not lie, not steal, respect everybody; we learn a profession we don’t really fancy, but it earns a living; we laugh at jokes we don’t find funny, but everybody laughs. We constantly accommodate others, we don’t dare to say ‘No’, we swallow our pride instead of speaking up… In short, we mostly pretend to be what we are not, as not conforming involves the risk of being an outsider, leaving us isolated, even unprotected, jeopardizing our most crucial emotion – to belong.

Right from the start, children are taught to behave in a certain way – girls don’t get angry; boys don’t cry. etc. Where does the anger go, where is the sadness expressed? The constant denial of what we really feel, who we really are, often creates a feeling of powerlessness, followed by the desire to control others, to instill fear – which can be observed in most of the leading politicians. Fear precedes aggression, a justification for conflict, even war.

All the above leads to a lack of self-worth. If we teach our children authenticity instead of just sincerity, if we, as adults, react in an authentic way instead of continuously accommodating to societal rules – then there would be a chance of moving into a more compassionate and empathetic world. 

How?

While sincerity means being true to others authenticity defines being true to myself. Being congruent with my personal values – regardless of external pressures to social conformity – shows authenticity. An authentic person shows their true colors, even their vulnerability. Not needing to control others, they are who they are and will speak their mind, if necessary.

Being authentic means being in touch with our emotions and taking responsibility for them - HERE and NOW. This is particularly important in relationships, with friends, our partners, within the family. It shows respect towards others, sharing wishes and needs at the particular moment instead of feeling hurt when those needs have not been met. I might be more vulnerable, not always perfect, it’s the moment where authenticity meets with sincerity.

Clearly, putting on a particular personality might avoid conflict, but we are losing out on opportunities to change and grow – we are trading growth for the short reward of being liked.

The true effect of lacking authenticity can be seen in the way how social media teach our kids (and us) to pretend, to impersonate, to focus on optimization as everybody seems to be convinced that we are not good enough – having to ‘run with the wolves’. As a consequence, millions of (young) adults keep denying who they really are until they are no longer aware of themselves, their inner values, their goals in life – with often toxic effect.

Authentic people know how words and actions feel as they are in touch with their own feelings. Consequently, they can imagine the feelings of others, of animals, of plants, ultimately of the whole environment and act accordingly. 

The Sermon on the Mount says,

‘Do not do to others what you do not want to be done to you.’

Could it be such a small step into a world of more peace and empathy?

Lao Tzu said, ‘the journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.’ 

Just as, at some time, maybe a wrong step was taken – with dire consequences – it is never too late to take the first step in the right direction, revealing the true inner spirit of humanity - and peace.

Stay Safe!

Ina

6 Minutes to Thrive in a ‘Changed’ World (part 8)

(Continuation of ‘6 Minutes to Complete Health’)

Is it a coincidence that there is such a propensity for Fear around us – and within us? 

Within counseling, we sometimes say Fear is ‘False Evidence Appearing Real’; this attitude might be applicable in personal situations of doubt, or procrastination. It also helps to encourage children to visualize and manifest their dreams in life.

However, at present, the world seems to be far away from ‘false evidence’. Looking around us, reasons for becoming fearful have been piling up; from a still unexplored virus to a massive climate change, a war resulting in inflation, another conflict threatening world peace – there seems to be no end. While we are torn between helplessness and anger, despair, and hope, we don’t even know anymore what to think, what to feel and – out of self-protection - often escape into a certain indifference. After all, we have our individual issues, worries, problems and need all our energy to stay afloat in our daily life.

Nevertheless, we feel callous to pursue our seemingly mundane lives in view of the confrontations, the injustice, and the suffering happening in the world. We simply don’t understand what is going on, which forms fertile ground for Fear. 

More than one hundred years ago, Marie Curie said ‘nothing in life is to be feared, it is only understood. Now is the time to understand more so we may fear less.’

Sadly, nothing seems to have changed as nothing has been understood.

Perhaps, a closer inspection of the emotion of Fear might give some insight, at least. Following the Metal season, November, December, and January are ruled by the Element of Water, the season of winter – at least within the Northern Hemisphere. It is a time of short days and long nights when the power of life has withdrawn and lies dormant in the seeds of nature before the new awakening in spring. The movement of Water is downward, pulling our consciousness into the depth of a spiritual quest into the meaning of life.

Corresponding to this vertical gravity are the Kidney and the Urinary Bladder, our lowest organs. The Kidneys – being the Guardians of our Jing (our Ancestral Energy) - are not only responsible for our physical well-being but also for the ‘Seed of Life’ (fertility), developmental issues and, above all, our immune system.

Within the Five Elements, Water is the only one that can change form, responding to environmental needs and conditions – be it steam, ice, a lake, a river, ocean waves, or a waterfall. Similarly, it is the Water Element which enables a person to adjust to life’s ups and downs, holding firm to their course of life, refusing to worry about past setbacks. Instead of trying to remove an obstacle, Water will find a way to flow around it without losing focus.

Water represents our spiritual Energy, the pursuit of knowledge. People dominated by this Element are usually strong willed, often fascinated by mysticism, and the underlying meaning of life – constantly asking, always trying to get to the ‘bottom of things’.

Within the social context, these people might crave stillness and solitude but are afraid of feeling abandoned. Fear is the emotion associated with the Water Element, mainly the primal Fear of survival, and of existence, do I have the right to live? It might be a coincidence that during these months of heightened vulnerability to people’s existence, their safety and security has become severely threatened. 

Our mood and attitude seem to be fluctuating like ocean waves, between empathy and horror, an occasional thirst for knowledge, ‘the truth’ and the denial of listening to anything that’s happening.

How can we protect us – physically (Immune System) and psychologically? The main enemies of Water are coldness and Fear – we all experience the urge to go to the bathroom once we have spent some time in a cold cinema. And we also know how we sometimes feel paralyzed with Fear (like a sheath of ice) before an important doctor’s appointment fearing some kind of unpleasant result. 

These are the months we should eat cooked food only. It is interesting that, during wintertime, our forefathers – maybe without knowing – have already consumed stews, game, goulash, and long cooked food. Likewise, all spices that we associate with Christmas are considered ‘warming’ in TCM – cloves, cinnamon, cardamom, ginger, anise, nutmeg, and vanilla – not to forget the mulled wine.  

Always protect your back, the kidney area and the coccyx, the bone at the bottom of your spine; don’t sit on a hard or cold surface. Interestingly, during these months, the same sensitivities occur within the Southern Hemisphere, despite not sharing the cold temperatures. 

And what can we do psychologically? Opposite the Water lies the Fire Element which is associated with the ‘Joy of Life’. We might not be able to change political situations, an economic downturn, or the depletion of rain forests. But we are in control of our thoughts and of our focus. There is (still) so much beauty around – nature, children, music, our friends, and families.

By injecting some daily Joy into the seemingly frozen Water, we could focus on melting the ice of Fear returning the Water to its natural state of flowing, adjusting to conditions where needed, no right or wrong, good or bad. Everything in life is based on perception – the only criteria can be ‘humanity’. 

Somebody said ‘Face Everything And Rise’ – whichever way we look at it we can only radiate to others what we feel. Maybe, just maybe, we can make a difference – one step at a time.

Stay safe!

Ina

6 Minutes to Thrive in a ‘Changed’ World (part 7)

(Continuation of ‘6 Minutes to Complete Health’)

How do you cope?

And what is the relationship between your coping mechanisms and your physical health?

The way we react to certain events depends firstly on our individual perception which is grounded on our basic character, family conditioning and our life experiences.

Most people are prone to a particular emotion – reacting easily angrily, frustrated while others become utterly sad, desperate, easily falling into depression. It is usually only a matter of time until physical ailments start as well. There is always a concrete cause of pain like overusing a certain part of our body, maybe an injury or 'getting older'. Of course, it can’t be denied that there is a certain deterioration due to prolonged use of ‘something’. A tool gets rusty if not constantly cleaned and oiled; a car that has not been professionally serviced for a long time will eventually break down; clothes that are not regularly washed and mended will fall apart and so on.

It is clear that we have to pay attention to our body - on all levels - and listen to what it is communicating to us. Interestingly, we spend much more time on our cars than on ourselves, our nutrition, our lifestyle.

Just for a moment, consider your ailments – big or small – what does your body tell you? Knee issues – apparently the most common source of pain - often occur through too much weight, lack of movement or an old injury flaring up. But knees also carry our skeleton, keep us straight and resilient through life, enable us to move forward, to take the ‘first step’. Flexible shoulder joints help us to move our arms to go into action, to help someone, to ‘get a grip’ on a certain situation, to develop flexibility – in mind and body.

In Chinese philosophy, the universe is ruled by the interrelationship of Five Elements (Metal, Water, Wood, Fire, and Earth). While on the surface, this might sound amusing or, in the best case, intriguing, it requires years of deeper psychological studies to understand the true meaning, their impact on individuals, humanity, even the world at large. The intense study of these metaphysical laws which have been around for thousands of years, is perpetually expanding our understanding of the ‘How and Why’.

The concept of the Five Elements arose from the interplay of Yin and Yang, representing different manifestations of Chi. This classification system relates to everything in the universe, including humans, nature, food, tastes, colors, attitudes, and moods. The Elements move in a predetermined cycle, supporting and controlling each other, always attempting to keep internal and external balance, ensuring health and safety.

Due to their association with certain body parts, organs, and tissues we are able to detect the effect of our mental status on our physical health. Alternatively, we can use our body as a tool to become aware of our subconscious emotional focus which we often suppress just ‘to keep peace’.

An additional aspect is the Five Elements’ effect on the course of time throughout the year. August, September, and October are mainly characterized by the Metal Element, embodying the essence of autumn. Moving towards` the end of the year, concentration and contraction are the main movements; the withering of plants and withdrawal of Life Force (Chi) prepare nature for the period of hibernation – winter.

In relation to our body, Metal is the Element that governs the Lungs (Yin) and the Large Intestine (Yang) – breathing, digestion and elimination being the most essential parts of sustaining life. It is this dual activity of inhaling and exhaling that defines Metal’s character – the change from expansion and contraction. While the lung receives the ‘Chi of Heaven’ the Large Intestine is the eliminator of waste. Receiving and releasing the are basic form of Energy transfer within our environment.

Dryness is the climate that challenges the Metal Element; it’s no wonder that coughing starts as soon as heating is switched on, rendering the air particularly dehydrated. As elderly people in their ‘autumn of life’ tend to drink less they are additionally dehydrating their body, causing bronchitis or hypertension as the blood tends to coagulate.

Emotionally, Metal expresses itself in sadness and grief, regret, and disappointment. Sensitive people tend to mourn perceived missed chances, engaging in melancholic thoughts. Constant crying involves our lungs up to the extent of not being able to breathe properly, almost suffocating amid our grief.

The sharpness of Metal symbolizes the separation from somebody, or something – the summer of youth and abundance, having to leave somebody or something. The respective issue does not have to be something drastic; it can be the leaving of a job, saying Farewell to somebody or even moving to a different place. People often have difficulties shaking off a common cold or persistent cough, despite antibiotics during those periods. Only after becoming aware of their underlying emotional status and its origin, the body can go into self-healing.

The tissue corresponding to Metal is the skin which is our main breathing and eliminatory breathing organ enabling us to stay in touch with the environment. Being the ultimate frontier between us and the outer world our skin may develop skin diseases due to accumulation of waste (Large Intestine) or allergies as a reaction to environmental stimuli.

As the Lung rules the Wei Chi (defending our immune system against pathogens), it is obvious that we must take special care during this season. Dryness must be avoided through drinking enough fluids. Regular sleep, eating cooked food only prevents coldness entering the body. Pears are the ideal fruit, especially as a compote (without sugar) because of their moisturizing properties. Almonds are known to strengthen the Yin of the Lungs which is particularly challenged during dry cough.

In case we catch a cold despite all our precautions, wrap a shawl around your neck to cover the two most important points in your neck (Gallbladder 20) where, according to Chinese philosophy, wind is entering the body. If feeling generally cold, having shivering attacks you will benefit from Ginger tea as Ginger is known to bring heat into the body. However, once fever sets in, Peppermint tea is taken to help the system to cool down.

Two foods which are to be avoided are salt and dairy products. Salt causes further constriction of the body fluids while milk and dairy products are well known to cause internal phlegm resulting in the well-known phlegmy cough.

No matter which aspect appeals to you, the main emotional aspect of Metal (autumn) is the much praised ‘letting go’ – letting go of old pain, old sorrow, past insults…. accompanied by 10 minutes of deep breathing…will do wonders for your Lungs and your physical and emotional health.

Stay safe!

Ina

6 Minutes to Thrive in a ‘Changed’ World (part 6)

(Continuation of ‘6 Minutes to Complete Health’)

The trappings of being an optimist…

Are you a pessimist, an optimist, a positive thinker, or a visionary?

It is interesting and revealing to see how people cope with challenging times. 

There are the pessimists who predict gloom and doom - humanity will become extinct, our planet will collide with a meteorite and explode, dinosaurs will re-emerge and rule the world…there is no limit to the fantasy of those who revel in hopelessness, fear, and a dark future.

Currently, it seems to be the majority - who are not able to see the beauty around them. Bombarded by the media and like-minded people they keep focusing on calamities and unhappiness because, in their opinion ‘that’s how it is’.

And then there are those ‘happy ones’, the optimists, who keep ignoring what is happening around them. Neglecting anything unfavorable – despite being aware of it - they keep suppressing their deep lingering anxiety seeking refuge in fun and entertainment, oblivious to the happenings around them. They refuse to understand that life is a tapestry of Yin and Yang, happy and unhappy being weaved together, that humanity develops by contrast.

However, the subconsciousness cannot be overruled indefinitely; subsequently, the constant pretense of continuous happiness not only costs a great deal of Energy, it bears the danger of a sudden rude awakening.

While an optimist makes a certain assumption about the world counting on that ‘everything will work out alright’, positive thinking is not based on assumptions but considers the possibility of a positive response to external influences. The positive thinker is aware of the challenges but does not automatically assume that everything will develop to their favor; instead, they put confidence in their ability to respond effectively, looking forward to a positive outcome. They understand the intricacies of life and accept the need to get involved in improving conditions of those around them.

A visionary is able to envision the future. He/she is creative, emotionally intelligent, with a growth-mindset, and strong imagination. This person does not ignore the so-called reality, on the contrary, they are fully aware of it, acknowledging challenges and tragedies without drowning in it. However, fueled by their imagination, passionate about their ideas, they live in their own world and might become too ‘lofty’ overlooking the necessity of active commitment to bring their vision closer to reality.

Nevertheless, numerous brain studies have shown that – contrary to positive thinker and optimists – the brain of a visionary creates a strong hormonal effect on a person.

Is that the reason why most great inventors, politicians, composers, and painters eventually survived hardship and still left incredible legacies? 

So, what is the best way to survive – even thrive?

The fundamental question is ‘how do I deal with life?’ 

Do I say, ‘Yes’ to what occurs around me accepting whatever happens - or do I say ‘No,’ claiming that life is not fair, complaining about my boss, the overtime, injustice in payment etc. 

Resistance to challenges is costing Energy. Our brain cannot let go, instead – feeling threatened - it gets fixated on negativity scanning for proof of truth, investing even more Energy.

But life just IS – it is neither good nor bad. Whether we are here, or somewhere else life does not change, it is only our thoughts which label our experiences as positive or challenging. Any negativity does not disappear because we are talking about it incessantly, complaining nonstop insisting on being right, that ‘this is not how it should be’. Instead, we can grow up and take responsibility for the way we are thinking.

Victor Frankl, a holocaust survivor, who experienced unimaginable pain and horror, was asked how he was able to survive those years. As a neurologist he knew the power of the brain. He knew that the brain thinks without our active participation – we don’t think, we are thought.

His famous sentence which might have kept him alive was, ‘I won’t put up with (the thoughts of) my brain.’

Admittedly, our present time is characterized by a great deal of uncertainty which is perceived by most humans as a fundamental threat.

Picasso coined the sentence ‘Secure and safe in uncertainty’ – how can that be achieved? 

We can determine our attitude to the uncertainty – do I perceive it as life threatening, causing me to stagnate, perhaps going into depression or do I see it as an accelerator for personal growth?

Coming back to the beginning – there is probably not only one way to deal with the present situation. Our approach might be a combination of several ways, depending on our personal demands. But, as a fundamental truth, we can take responsibility for our thoughts, getting out of helplessness, accepting life and decide not to put up with every thought of our brain.

What is your attitude?

Stay safe!

Ina

6 Minutes to Thrive in a ‘Changed’ World (part 5)

(Continuation of ‘6 Minutes to Complete Health’)

The altered meaning of ‘home’…    

According to the UN, the number of displaced people has reached a staggering 110 million. This includes about 36 million refugees, asylum seekers but also millions of digital nomads plus about 60 million expats (people who live outside their country of origin) - it becomes apparent that the meaning of ‘home’ is under a drastic change. 

A mere hundred years ago, ‘home’ was the country, where we were born, the town we grew up in, the house where family life happened, where life seemed to be safe, predictable, following a known structure. Travelling, venturing into unknown territory, was cumbersome, often dangerous.

With the advent of economic success, people started to look ‘beyond’ their familiar surroundings; they became curious of different places. Often, those seemed to offer more excitement, offering a respite out of the humdrum of their everyday life. However, after a few days or weeks of staying in an - up to then - unknown place, the attraction faded away as one was starting to look forward to returning ‘home’, where life was predictable. The contrast to the places visited helped to define the meaning of ‘home’ – no surprises, security and familiarity, no need to adjust.

Over the following years of globalization and mass tourism, the meaning of ‘home’ seemed to be changing again. Curiosity took over, the world seemed to shrink, and the original meaning of ‘home’ seemed to be watered down giving way to another interpretation – that of belonging or identity. Maybe I feel more ‘at home’ in a different country, different culture, different climate? Or with different people?

Maybe I don’t relate to any particular place, discovering that the feeling of ‘home’ is just that, a feeling, a vibration inside myself which is triggered by a sight, a smell, a sound, a particular dish?

The Chinese language describes home as ‘Jia’. The respective compound 家 (home) is comprised of 宀 (roof radical) and 豕 (pig). In ancient China, when hunger was often rampant, people raised their pigs inside their homes to keep them safe. Subsequently, having pigs in the house (under the roof) became associated with having a bountiful home providing security.

If we ask young children, ‘home’ is their family, parents, the place where they were born, the language they speak - aptly called ‘mother tongue’ – where they went to school and forged first friendships.

However, soon the meaning of ‘home’ begins to fluctuate, becoming vague, giving way to the search of belonging and identity. Young people are moving abroad for studying or work. As societies became more and more mobile it is not unusual for families to be scattered over different places, countries, even continents - especially during present times when job security can’t be taken for granted anymore. Simultaneously, the notion of ‘home’ is being overtaken by curiosity, often necessity, new impressions, excitement. After all, humans like and learn by contrast – some more, some less.

So, what is ‘home’? Due to above mentioned changes, there is no easy answer.

Is it the place where your family resides, where you feel comfort, and security, full of memories?

Or is it the intangible feeling you get in a location, a sense of peace and joy, where you feel welcome?

Or is it a more spiritual connection – where you feel you belong because your ideas and values are like those of the people around you?

Or – different again - TCKs (Third Culture Kids, who grow up in a different country than that their parents grew up in), mostly don’t relate to any place as ‘home’ as everything is just a temporary dwelling place. They display a host of characteristics, very different from kids who were raised in their parents’ home country. Apart from their immediate family, their ‘home’ is the friends who they met throughout the years, perhaps in different countries. Due to their unique attitude, value system and lifestyle, which they developed as a coping mechanism, they get on best with other TCKs with whom they feel ‘at home’.

Climate change has taught us another aspect of ‘home’ as we must painfully realize that ultimately our planet is our home. War has shown us that ‘home’ is not necessarily a building but the place ‘where the ancestors are buried’. And finally, when our physical form leaves the planet, we say ‘he/she went home to the Lord’.

Apparently, ‘home’ is not just a place, nor a house. But a particular place or a house might evoke certain feelings which make you feel at home. It is not just people but friends and family who support you and value your support, who you have been sharing memories with. It is not even a particular country as every country is a combination of a myriad of aspects. Which aspects correspond with your values – security, predictability?

In the end, ‘home’ has become synonymous with a feeling, a sense of belonging – which might change, depending on our personal development and the resulting needs. As our world is rapidly changing so will certain aspects of our life; what was crucial yesterday has become insignificant today.

What do you consider ‘home’? Where do you feel secure? After all, we are all just vibrations, so it is only logical that only where our vibrations are meeting with corresponding vibrations, we feel truly ‘at home’ – not every day, not everywhere…but our mind and heart will tell us.

Stay safe – wherever you feel at home!

Ina

6 Minutes to Thrive in a ‘Changed’ World (part 4) (Continuation of ‘6 Minutes to Complete Health’) What is the cause of so much anger? Watching the news or reading the newspaper, we seem to be swamped with reports of conflicts, demonstrations, war, and fighting – mainly about food, human rights, equality, and peace. It seems no area in our life is spared of sometimes extreme outbursts of anger and one wonders – is this the new face of humanity? And then you look into the eyes of a baby and become aware of the human essence which is pure joy – to be alive, to be loved, filled with excitement in anticipation of what’s in store, and you realize that we are not born angry. Several years of a pandemic, lockdowns, and loneliness, have stripped us down to our essence. We became aware of our intrinsic values, the need for human touch, togetherness, understanding and realized the comparative insignificance of financial wealth, status, power, the need to be right. We learned that understanding each other does not equal agreeing or even condoning different opinions and attitudes. And we swore that we would transfer these insights into the new ‘post pandemic’ life. We would become more humble, and respectful towards each other, appreciating our new freedom, and being grateful. But suddenly – before this could take hold in our consciousness/behavior, a war started. A war which we all had once sworn, would never, ever happen again. And simultaneously, angry crowds, and demonstrations turn up almost everywhere – or maybe they have been simmering already for a long time? Numerous psychological studies have revealed that anger is not really a solitary emotion but very often serves as camouflage for other emotions that might not be acceptable in society. While working with people trying to manage their anger, most people discover underneath their anger a lingering feeling of sadness or regret (where is the ‘lightness of being’?) and the dawning discovery that we must let go, separate from the world we have known. Have you ever seen the tears in the eyes of an angry child, not getting what they want? Those are tears of disappointment and deep sadness. And, in the face of the daily events being delivered to us by every medium possible, we are gripped by another emotion: underlying fear, a sense of helplessness, constantly asking what can I do? Where does all this lead to? When will it stop? Out of this perceived powerlessness, the desire to exert control gives rise to active aggression which seems to compensate us – at least for a short while – until we fall back into the original feeling of disappointment and utter helplessness. How can we change our response to what happens? Investigating what we really feel and discovering that the respective emotion is acceptable and understandable might be more honest and liberates one from the urge of wielding an extreme degree of frustration. It is ok to cry, to be sad, it is ok to admit the feeling of powerlessness. And it is also ok to get angry once in a while, channeling it into exercise, creativity or going out into nature. Because constantly suppressed anger – and its underlying emotions – will quickly turn into depression which is aggression towards oneself. We might not be able to stop a war overnight or create more justice for everybody. But we also must not forget that everything starts with one person, radiating to two, then six…eventually affecting the whole mood of millions. So, we could at least try to make a difference – for us, those near us, and everyone around us. Stay safe – on all levels! Ina

6 Minutes to Thrive in a ‘Changed’ World (part 3)

(Continuation of ‘6 Minutes to Complete Health’)

How to deal with anxiety?

There is no denying that the world experiences a massive upheaval. It is not about the individual events that have been upsetting for everybody; after all, there have been financial crises every couple of years – mostly caused by human greed and irresponsible speculations. There also has been 9/11 which jolted us all out of our safety, resulting in the Gulf war and its consequences. But, at no time, we experienced so many ‘disturbances’ on all levels, in all countries – at the same time: the last war amid Europe happened 75 years ago; the last steep inflation occurred in the 1970s; the last horrific pandemic took place more than one hundred years ago. 

Globalization and digitalization have been acting as a fire accelerator, carrying every disaster and its consequences almost immediately into the furthest corners of our planet. We could call ourselves ‘united by tragedy’, and we are. After all, the world’s population more than doubled within the last 50 years! 

And the impact of nature trying constantly to get into balance affects everybody constantly, albeit at a different level.

The world’s Energy moves in stages. As different philosophies talk about different Energetic systems, they have one aspect in common – the recognition of moving into a new phase. Of course, this does not happen overnight, it is a gradual shift, lasting several years, which started with the pandemic already. 

The sudden awareness of our vulnerability, the constant discord between people and governments, the fear-mongering of the media, and the forced isolation of humans during a time when one needed the comfort of family and friends most have all resulted in a subtle feeling of uneasiness, distrust, and loss of confidence that ‘all will be well’. Countless studies have described the still lingering anxiety that had no chance to recover, especially in children who seem to be affected.

Maybe I am just stressed, or do I suffer already from anxiety? 

While stress causes physical and mental symptoms, like racing thoughts, insomnia, muscle tension, irritability, and fatigue, anxiety is characterized by excessive worries, obsessive thoughts, unable to relax, always expecting the worst even though the original trigger is absent. Extreme anxiety can result in a panic attack. 

There is nothing I can do about the world’s situation, right?

While, as an individual, we might not be able to change what happens on the world’s stage, we are in charge of the way we react to it – and subsequently create a different result which, again, will influence the people next to us, radiating into more and more ripples in the sea of calamities and finally affecting the world at large.

There are three main ways how to deal with situations of distress – we can ignore it, claiming that it is all made up by the media, that it is nothing new, or that it will soon disappear. Or we observe what is happening, watch the news daily several times, read the papers, and have endless discussions with friends and colleagues, drowning in a feeling of doom and blame. Both reactions are futile in our attempt to deal constructively with change. Facts cannot be ignored, nor should they be exaggeratedly spiraling us into either inconsideration or despair. 

As always, there is a middle way, which is accepting the facts, observing one’s possibilities of responding with flexibility and adjusting to new circumstances instead of digging one’s heel in refusing the shift.

What can I do about my anxiety – or the anxiety of my kids? Since the emotion of anxiety is caused by a connection of the mind (thoughts) and the body (feeling) it is accessible only by mind/body techniques. Powerlessness seems to be the most prominent feeling which is mostly caused by an accumulation of stressful, irrational thoughts that seem to be out of our control. 

Imagine you are wearing a tie and slap lightly with your flat hand over the knot, close your eyes, let your anxiety rise – don’t fight it; what you resist persists – breathe deeply…until you start to sigh, to yawn, to cry, to laugh…that’s all a release of the accumulated Energy; it might take 30 seconds or two minutes, rarely more. Too voodoo? 

Here is the explanation: the two points, about 5 cm below the knobby point of your two collarbones is called Kidney 27 in TCM. The kidney organ is associated with existential fear, the immune system, our self-confidence, and feeling grounded. The sensitive climate is cold – that’s why we run to the toilet after sitting in a cold room (bladder) or before seeing the doctor or waiting for an important interview (fear). 

In Western medicine, the same two points are responsible for lymphatic drainage – to release all the toxins, particularly our unpleasant thoughts, and feelings. Between these two points, in the middle of our breastbone lies the Thymus. Being responsible for our immune system, we are born with a well-functioning thymus. But, after puberty, it shrinks. By tapping all three points individually (called the three thumps) or all together as described above, the thymus is activated again, the lymphatic drainage is triggered and the kidney is able to release the accumulated energy of fear and anxiety.

A small gesture – which really could help us to do the step from Chaos to personal Peace. And, who knows – maybe, very slowly all could be well.

Stay safe – on all levels!

Ina

6 Minutes to Thrive in a ‘Changed’ World (part 2)

(Continuation of ‘6 Minutes to Complete Health’)

A new beginning or the apocalypse?

It’s springtime – albeit in the Northern Hemisphere only - nevertheless for some reason this time of the year seems to be universally considered as the season of (new) growth and development.          One reason might be the increasing light which causes serotonin in humans to rise - the neurotransmitter that uplifts our mood, influencing almost every function in our body and mind. As a lack of serotonin plays an important role in depression and anxiety, among others, it is easy to understand why these conditions are particularly apparent during the dark winter months.

Serotonin also influences our ability to learn, understand, be more decisive, and become clearer about our life’s purpose. The most profound effect seems to be on our psyche – we fall in love more easily, feel more adventurous, start new projects and, overall, are reminded that even in dark moments, eventually, there is light shining on new hope. 

Nature has been manifesting this principle for millions of years; after going dormant for several winter months, nature wakes up to be reborn. New possibilities are created, new forms of plants, adjusting to environmental changes, new forms of animal life, new weather conditions – always yearning to keep balance in the bigger picture.

The underlying eternal principle is the relationship of Yin and Yang; bearing this symbol in mind it is apparent that ‘extreme Yin turns into Yang’ and ‘extreme Yang turns into Yin’. What does it mean? 

After the darkness of the night (Yin) sunlight signals a new day (Yang); after years of exuberant youth, full of adventure and discovery (Yang), we slowly become more settled, wiser, and looking more inward (Yin); after a time of despair (Yin), hope will emerge and new opportunities (Yang) spring up. One only has to observe a child, crying her heart out about a lost toy or some argument – before she forgets everything, going back into joy, and continuing to play happily.

Is this too lofty? Too much sugarcoating during serious times? 

There is no denying that we experience a most disturbing phase, causing everyone to encounter bouts of anxiety and depressive tendencies, which increase our focus on negative thoughts.

We are in a sea of uncertainty, our legs dangling, trying to find solid ground, our arms thrashing about to move forward, but we don’t even know where we want to go. We definitely can’t go back – life has to be lived forward but is understood backward. 

This understanding should be our way to provide a solid ground for the younger generation, the kids, the ones in their 20ies and 30ies as they are the ones who will have to deal with environmental issues, inflation, incapable governments, and feelings of fundamental uncertainties.

It is shocking to read that 10 years-old kids are indoctrinated with warnings about gloomy times ahead, that the number of depressed children at a young age has been on the rise during the past few years and a new word has been coined – ‘eco fear’, the fear that their economic future is in jeopardy, no more ensuring their – and their offspring’s – survival.

While all these aspects cannot be ignored it is even more important to encourage the next generation to create their lives, to inform them about potential dangers but, at the same time, to point out solutions, direct their focus on ‘what is good in this world’. It is absolutely amazing how much creativity, especially in so-called developing countries, has resulted in environmental changes, even though at a small scale, only.

During the last few years, humans had to experience disease, political and religious unrest, and, ultimately, war. But we also were allowed to encounter unconditional support – sometimes by strangers even. We learned about our personal capacity for endurance, of flexibility; we learned to share whatever we had, to improvise; we learned to appreciate – nature and each other. For an apparently limited time, we felt as one people, experiencing interdependency and responsibility for each other.

Life has always been unpredictable – different developments (political, economic, technical…) have been causing different challenges, requiring a different approach. Instead of treading water and thrashing about in the futile intention to move ahead on our own personal path, it is our legacy to those after us to stay still for a moment, allowing us to float, giving others the same space, not hindering them by making unnecessary waves. 

Childhood should be full of innocence which provides strength for the coming years. Teenage years are meant for (self)discovery while the later years will help to consolidate lessons learned, define one’s place within the big web of opportunities, and recognize one’s values – to oneself and to others.

Our responsibility – the ability to respond – must be to recognize ‘what is’ but not get stuck there. Instead assist the younger people in staying hopeful, keeping their creativity to change the world – after all, aren’t we ‘creatures’?

And, if you feel gloomy yourself, after the dark winter months, hopeless while watching the news, helpless by attending to an unwell friend, tired of constantly encouraging a pessimistic relative – here are some ways to increase your serotonin level:

Exposure to bright light; stay at least 15-20 minutes daily outside

If the weather is not suitable, invest in a daylight lamp

Exercise – especially aerobic exercise that pushes up your heartbeat

Diet – eat food rich in tryptophan which is converted into serotonin. Combine it with a bit of carb to be more effective: e.g. whole-wheat bread with turkey or cheese, oatmeal with a handful of nuts, salmon with brown rice

Meditation – allow yourself 15-20 minutes of sitting still, focusing on your breathing, and letting your thoughts come and go without attaching to them

Sleep – try to get at least 7-8 hours of sleep; sleep deprivation over a longer period of time increases anxiety

Most of All, watch your thoughts – do you focus on ‘what is’ or on how you want it to be?

Stay safe – on all levels!

Ina

6 Minutes to Thrive in a ‘Changed’ World (part 1)

(Continuation of ‘6 Minutes to Complete Health’)

What is change?

It definitely has been the most used word during the closing year - the business world has changed, the world economy has changed, the value of our money has changed…And who would have thought that a war would change literally everything, touching everybody’s life, and jeopardizing massively the future of our planet, our only home.

And, above all hovers the all-consuming climate change – endangering flora and fauna, causing droughts and flooding, unbearable heat and freezing cold, rendering humans defenseless in the face of possible pandemics that often defy logic explanation. 

But did the climate really change? Or did nature just respond?                                                              

Nature always responds to any impact - to adjust, create, to survive and find the eternal balance of hot and cold, dry and wet, ensuring organic living conditions for those who chose to live on Planet Earth.

It is obvious that humans disturbed this balance, but why? Is it the continuous ambition to explore, to conquer that drives humans into isolated areas, eradicating pristine jungles, scaling almost unsurmountable mountains, and hunting rare species for personal status or decoration?

Long before Christianity, humans adhered to the belief that there is life in everything – there were Spirits in the mountains, Gods ruled the seas, and nature was inhabited by different deities. Before setting out to fish, the Gods of the sea needed to be appeased by specific rituals putting them into a good mood, relinquishing the catch to the fishermen, and ensuring not only a safe return but also their survival for another day. Nature was never destroyed; instead, only what was needed for survival was taken, keeping nature able to continuously replenish itself.

Until today, aborigines have been living the same way, ensuring harmony and their survival. Still today, in Bhutan, mountains higher than 6000m are forbidden to climb as this is considered the seat of the Gods.  A deep understanding of nature rules their world.

Then, Christianity started and, with it, a drastic change took place. The Holy Bible now served as a book of instructions. Natives who believed in Spirits and animalism were called ‘primitives’, subjected to mockery, contempt or even worse.

In the first book of Genesis, we find the sentence ‘Be fruitful, multiply and replenish the Earth and subdue it. Have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the fowl in the air and over every living being that moves upon the Earth.’ With the ‘permission of God’, humans now started to enjoy the richness, given by nature – before turning to subjugation, exploitation, and manipulation, to feed the ever-growing population. But where was the ‘replenishment’?

No, the climate did not change – nature just responded. It has been responding to human action that did not change – despite warnings and signs of impending disasters.

The sad part is that this stubborn refusal to change and adjust, fed by insatiable greed has not served us, it was not even necessary for the survival of our species: an outstanding characteristic of humans is the almost infinite capability to adapt to different temperatures, climates, or physical challenges. Our body is able to adjust its temperature to an almost extreme extent. 

Why did we cause this? Where is the trigger? Is it just greed, born out of fear? Being Christian or not – it is unimaginable that this has been God’s wish.

There has never been the need to violate the sanctity of the Planet. As we all know, our planet does not need us – on the contrary. Earth will always find its own balance, adjusting here and there, offering different kinds of food – there is enough for everybody.

As we are now forced to adjust, will we finally do the same, or will we continue to refuse change?

Happy New Year!

Ina